Only a mothe r could love this liver
dude on moped wearing crocs...somebody get this guy his man card back
sleeping like a two year old who chased ambien with a bottle of whiskey.
Just found out its our ciliated mucous membrane that traps the molly when we snort it. Biology does relate to life
There are a bunch of guys at the door looking for the guy you brought back to the condo...pretended not to speak English. You're welcome.
I have got to stop getting laid on my lunch breaks. I AM SO HUNGRY RIGHT NOW.
Throwing up so forcefully that toilet water hits you in the face is not what the Pilgrims and Indians had in mind for this holiday
Might be time to reevaluate my life. Banned from red roofs inns. Apparently I puked in ice machine. 3 hotels in a year.
Idk who invented dominoes cheese steak pizza but I wanna lick their balls
I have to call my new boss to accept the job offer so you have pack the bowl while I pretend I'm a responsible adult THEN we can get high
Sexual favors are the only currency recognized by the Republic of Greg
Unless he's under 18, in which case you put him back where you found him this instant.
I tried to suck your dick underwater and almost drowned
The guy I hooked up with last night left me alone with his dog AND IT JUST SHIT ON THE FLOOR. WHAT DO I DO
I have a whole new respect for her. She chugged half a bottle of jack daniels, and then peed all over his wall. Serves him right.
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