its easy. just sleep with a bunch of guys until one falls in love
My mom make sausages for dinner...and all I could think of was your dog's penis..
There was a lot of him and a little penis
I think his glow in the dark Star Wars sheets, at the time, really turned me on.
I need to get my pants from under your porch. People are asking questions.
It's just a matter of time. The ball is in my court. Soon to be in her mouth.
She gave such good road head it was turned into side-of-the-road head for everyone's safety
You fucked her?! HER?!
She sent me a nudie pic with a bunch of weed nuggets all over her tits...what was I supposed to do? I don't hate America sir.
Also I just had a flash back ... He told me I have nice nipples and then asked me about yours..
It's cosmic balancing. My vagina is an instrument of karmic retribution.
Agreed then we'll really be on our A game tomorrow. And by A I mean alcohol.
He just texted me saying "you've got a face that suggests you give really good head". Is this a compliment? Do I say thanks?
St. Patrick's day can kiss my ass. Still hungover. I guess I showed up at my gym blacked out yesterday morning. Like im not missing a gym day b
I just motorbotted some guy and my hair got stuck in his nipple ring...owww
Gameplan: If the cops show up, find a potted plant to hide behind... It's worked before!
Randomize
