she just sneezed while going down on me. is it rude for me to ask her to do it again?
Best text conversation ever. Other than the one we had about using blood for lube.
Just had to explain to the nurse WHERE I have poison ivy. Great Day
I didn't sleep with her. I'm boycotting arizona and she's from phoenix.
i knew it was going to be a good night when i was bleeding, licked it and it tasted like miller light
I've officially decided that whoever created hate sex should be on my christmas card list.
Well I found you sipping ron diaz out of a child's dinosaur cup while sticking your fingers in the guy's fish tank and watching the "pirahnas" snap at your finger and laughing
Your girlfriend is in jail- I've just never been able to use that in a sentence before. Thank you both!
I've literally already typed in by booty call text for friday night. all I have to do now is wait for is drunk me to press send
Yep. I'm going to buy a sex toy and a LARP prop on the same trip. Welcome to my life.
I'm getting drunk by myself again. But I'm not shotgunning any of them. That's self-restraint, right?
Who knew a blowjob could cause this kind of crazy
He wasn't prepared for it
She just kept feeding people pretzels and sayying "You're such a good goldfish."
Our sex from this weekend should be engraved into a plaque or commemorated somehow. It was fucking amazing.
He ate me out for my sailor moon manga and I gave him a blowjob for his Devilman manga. Pretty sweet deal imo
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