The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
Just watched my manager erase "we've been 2 days wo an accident" and change it to "0" these ppl are too high.
is drinking for groundhog day legit?
well you blacked out on MLK day and we pregamed arbor day, so yes
She brought an overnight bag to my party. Might as well have shown up wearing only a thong and a bottle of whip cream in her hand.
Did we both pass out talking about cake last night?
we are watching a video on ethics because somebody wrote "butt sex" on the attendance sign in sheet
After throwing up, the toothpaste tasted so good. Thank you for not letting me eat it.
She apparently grabbed another girl and pulled her into the shower fully clothed. When the girl was like "you need to stop" she curled up into a ball and refused to leave.
Whoa, you know how to pick em.
I just saw a wasted dude crawl out of the road at 2 in the afternoon. Big question- still drunk from the weekend or hitting the soju already?
I got Pilsbury cinnamon rolls for us to have tomorrow, but I don't have the willpower to leave them in my fridge overnight, so I am eating them all and getting us more in the morning
I love you more by the minute
Well I checked the bush outside his apartment building this morning, and he wasn't there... So I knew he was home.
I should get an "I gave blood today" type of sticker, but instead it would say "I went balls deep today"
The amount of drunk I'm going to get tonight will be somewhere between Jim lahey and bojack horseman
She made me keep my boots on and say "you're welcome darlin" after every orgasm......so yes it was an awesome night.
they gave me money. the money smells like weed. also they gave me weed
Randomize
