If a woman tells you she has been pink socked...don't move forward with her.
ps i may or may not be wearing a sequined bra
That shot tasted like Sant Claus came in my mouth. I love the holidays.
we were having sex and she freaked out when i said nipple
I started dry heaving in the middle of sex and she says "You moan funny."
We need somewhere to take these girls. Otherwise it's a orgy in the Mazda.
planned ethnic drinking holidays while bored at work thru next may. I don't suppose you have any scots or russian in you?
he could've at least fucked me twice. that's just common courtesy.
I went from naked with lasts nights hookup to Ihop in 6 minutes flat
I think that's a new house record
Btw, if I didn't have 3 limbs in restraints and my free hand offing myself with the pocket rocket, I would have snap chatted you. Next time.
She had pubes that could make an episode of Duck Dynasty. Fear the Vag Beard
Let's say hypothetically if you were going to put icing on a penis and then lick it clean...what would you ice it with? Not a knife right?
That's probably when I climbed a tree and told everyone I was an ornament
Thought for a game. Duck, Duck, Grey Goose. If you're tapped, you take a shot. Then proceed as normal.
just played fuck the dealer and thunderstruck with my physics ta. he is the third ta that i have drank with this semester, i think i'm getting good at college
Randomize
