I just walked by a ginger with a mullet. I repeat GINGER mullet. So help us God.
wtf. i just found you're porn stash.
u like it?
NOT THE POINT.
Cuntadactyl. (n). A pre-historic dinosaur of Mandy-like features that is primarily identified by it's inability to play well with others and overall C-word demeanor. Physically, an unfortunate appearance.
I envy you so much. I get girls who pee on my floor and you get girls who leave in the middle of the night
for future reference: anal bleach BEFORE boozing
i had the all of mcdonalds chanting USA as he motorboated you
it was like, one of those nights where you keep going back to the fridge because you just can't get full. except, with sex.
I should not be in class today. For the professors sake.
I told him if I was pregnant we were coming out to the people at work, because I'm not pretending to get knocked up by an imaginary boyfriend.
Do you have any need for a scary clown mask?
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
Dude. Cvs sells sex toys. And my discount works on them. Game on.
I dont have to work tomorrow im yelling gibberish at squirrels
Who put the meatball sub on my door handle?
my nextdoor neighbor called me saying "um hey, your mom just stumbled into bed with me and my husband, can you please come get her?"
Randomize
