For the record I fully support drunken you in most social situations... Just not charity events.
Just before going down on me she said, "I need a hairband for all of the jobs I'm about to perform."
remember that guy i blew in a bathroom in barcelona, i just blew him again in rome. lightning does strike twice.
From russia with love. But also with chlamydia.
God I love incriminating evidence...wonder what the statue of limitations is on shitting on someones driveway
He kissed my hand AND my forehead. I don't think this virginity business is for heartless whores like us.
Well, my eyeball is red and the rest of my eye is black. Oh the joys of drinking with u. PS- I laid in a pile of sawdust. it was ok at the time.
Good, I would never sleep with your boyfriend , or send you an edible arangment
You owe me beer. On another note, I made out with the ups guy at work today ....
Just a couple of adults talking about cum shots at 8am on presidents day
I keep finding granola in my bed. This is what I get for sleeping with a guy from Oregon.
I'm just now realizing I've slept with guys from three different decades over the past year. That's gotta be some sort of record.
He said he’s shouting let’s get this bread the first time we have sex...
He’s very straightforward
I woke up next to a Big Mac box.. And had no sheets or clothes on. The night was a success I think.
The only good thing about being back at work is supply room boom boom with my office husband
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