return my video game
Thong +tight pants =hungry butt. Not a good look on big women! Walmart sucks.
i just peed out my two story window using my cell phone as a flashlight . hope the neighbors didnt see
We're playing Big Buck Hunter to determine who buys the next pitchers. And they said video games wouldn't help me later in life
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
ew. I made a sandwich, and the cheese reminded me of her vagina
It was like a secret agent hookup. No names, swift execution, get in- get out.
You've ruined blow jobs for me. You were the motzart of sucking dick, where every other girl is like awkward elevator music
Became best friends with the hotdog stand creeper outside the bar. Cried and told him my feet hurt too much to walk home then begged him to hire me.
Finding a keg in our kitchen would be like god personally high fiving each of us.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I should probably go to bed before I start to care about why I started drinking in the first place.
he ate me out like 4 times and told me that my vagina "was too much fun".
I have a diplomatic trade for you. My pants for your rum. Tomorrow?
I was stopped at a light on my way home and a priest threw holy water on my car. Seems fitting after last night.
All I've done for this 11 hour car ride is kegel and listen to our sex playlist so your dick better be good and ready
Man i fell asleep on a random persons porch on the way home and woke up to the family banging on the windows trying to wake me up
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