Considering that my ex-wife dumped me to become a lesbian, the Universe owes me a threesome.
he sent her a picture of his penis to show that he "trusts her" or some shit like that..well she showed it to me, and let me just tell you..it looked like a freaking slug or something. creepiest penis i've ever seen. hands down
Gotta love hanging with Nat. By the time guys realize she isnt going home with them, they've spent enough money and time to think I'm a good idea.
Well, I can't relate. I have no idea what it feels like to withhold sex. Or have self-control in general.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the tow truck driver and i bonded while discussing our experiences with four lokos
i'm not a hellocoptur, but youer in a dorm ans im un a dorm
I've done nothing but whore my gay ex bf out for the past 48 hours. It's getting weird.
It was like giving head to a cactus.
I need to hump something and I know u understand.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My goal is to go an entire semester without cocaine. That's an adult goal right?
HES DOING PULLUPS BE STILL MY BEATING HEART
like i literally can feel my uterus getting frustrated at me for not being pregnant.
My dad slapped my ass the other day and say I was "doing the family name good". I feel...proud
Do you ever wake up and realize playing beer pong with your parents wasnt a dream? Your mom really beat you
My brother is coming home and he is bringing a whole bunch of friends with him. I am making him a cake. What should i put on it?
"Open for business" or "I have condoms" would probably work
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