just found his boxers balled up inside my tights, hidden in my freezer. damn i love college.
You know what sound is wonderful for a hangover? Listening to the horns from the South Africans at the world cup
Haha its ok. When we got back you sat in the car and attempted to tell me in sign language you were blacked out lol
No, he's ok. He just broke his teeth on the stripper pole. No biggie.
She's trying to figure out what kind of dinosaur I am... Yay codeine.
Kid sitting next to me smells like he slept in a dutch oven full of farts. Going to die.
You never know, some chick could have a weird unibrow fetish.
Well I talked to some Canadians today, and I'm keeping a vigilant watch for sharks, so I'm pretty booked up.
I took a hang over nap infront of the door to my 9am class
it's my birthday, i should be around people i want to fuck
One of the annoying girls in my 7 AM class showed up drunk for her 21st birthday and just auctioned off her fake ID.
I don't care how hot she is, her cat has pissed on me twice.
You can't say "my boobs are wonderful" and not expect my drunken subconscious to focus on wanting to see them. Btw-can I see them?
Well. I hope my dad likes whatever sweater stoned me picks out.
NO FUCKING RANDOMS IN AN ALLEY
Randomize
