Superbowl + Mdma, hope we're on the same page.
we went through the mcdonalds drive through and you asked for a free sample of their fries to see how you liked them.
The lid of our salsa is promoting a contest that ended in July '09
Hypothetical question: If a guy wanted to watch you fuck me, would you be willing to take a long lunch break on Wednesday?
You know, last years football game was epic, but seeing the same girl that gave you a bj in the parking lot, in the same parking spot...that's fate.
You should make it a point to use vocabulary that is competition appropriate around him, like "champion" and "training" and "victory sex"
Hey please buy toilet paper today. Plastic grocery bags are starting to hurt now
I'll even be awesome and bring pizza for your family, just as a "hey thanks for letting a stranger get trashed at your house" gesture.
People around me are just doing lines of cocaine. Like its no big deal. And I'm just here like.... Y'all want some cheezits?
theres too many punctuation errors in that text to turn me on.
Dear Jesus. Send me strength to not suck cock this morning.
I really have to stop having sex with people I sell drugs to...it feels unprofessional
I told him I wanted to fuck him and he hasn't texted me back in 4 days...am I missing something
She just. Cock slapped me. With string cheese.
No bra. No panties. Makeup from last night. At work right now. I am trash.
Randomize
