I just farted at work and tried to cover up the noise by shuffling papers around
he kind of looks like leonardo dicaprio...in whats eating gilbert grape
wtf, did you fuck a retard?!
why the fuck would he compare you to sexy aquatic creatures?
I vaguely remember you trying to make me a casserole with marshmallows and a can of beer.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
God I love incriminating evidence...wonder what the statue of limitations is on shitting on someones driveway
I'm not sending you pictures to jack off to. That's not what friends do
Question: should I be considering heels or is this the kind of night where I should plan on falling on my face regardless of my choice of footwear?
Thank you, I really appreciate that. I know I couldn't participate in class tonight and I hope that doesn't affect my grade too much. So please let me know of any extra credit opportunities such as fellatio
THIS CHICK IS LIKE SOME SORT OF HOOKER HOUDINI.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't know but this 12 year old kid is soaking up all of our bad morals like a super tampon on the second day of my period
He's hot....knda sweaty, drunk smells like feet....but he's hung like a whale....so in other words totally your type
Last night was a whirlwind of vodka - induced emotion
He got me to hold his phone, wallet, keys and pants while he hooked up with another girl.
Apparently when you start crushing adderall and blending them into your margaritas calling them blenderalls you have "a problem" WTF
Um. I just realized I still have a beer in my purse from last night. I'm at work. I am so classy.
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