Okay so if I'm going to keep referring to my hangover in the third person it needs a name.
i really should have bought real food rather than condoms, olives, coleslaw and beer...
And on the subject of embracing my inner whore, I had two different dicks in my mouth yesterday. Friend, it's official. I'm completely outta control.
Yup. Dog walker, house sitter and mistress to the rich, bored and bi-curious. I've got a nice little operation running.
that's the second time I've made out with him and woken up with my pants stuffed with PBRs I am convinced he's magic
I don't have any plans for New Year's except watching anime and drinking until I can't read the subtitles anymore.
I swear she is the Mary Poppins of drugs
I woke up to his balls in my face, so naturally I limboed under him and headed to the bathroom. When I came out he was asleep on the floor.
She said her name is "Goose" and regardless of her being a lesbian, sometimes she just "needs a good dick"
I'm still questioning who dropped me off last night. So successful wedding?
I mean, I already saw his dick in person and wasn't impressed so why is he sending me a picture of it, anyway? I hate re-runs!
My adderall dealer raised his prices due to "impending inflation" ... never buying from a college grad again
However many condoms you have, it isn't enough.
the fact that I've been his fuck buddy for a year, and I'm pregnant isn't bothering me. the fact that he didn't tell me about his girlfriend does.
These freshmen are fun! The redhead wants to practice her blowjob skills with me and let me rate different moves!
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