he told me it was because of the roids, but i couldn't tell if he meant ster or hem.
my neighbors are having lesbo sex right now.
I'm on my way.
You know how I know it's Spring Break? I just passed a car with "South Padre bound" shoe polished on the back. The driver was blatantly drinking a roadie and getting road head.
Just hooked up with a girl I met in line at Taco Bell. I told you leave me to do my own thing and I'll get it in
She tried to cook Velveeta IN the oven on clean mode.
bro, sorry for: trying to put you on fire yesterday, telling the bouncer that it was you that broke the bottles, and to have slept with your sister.
Im making gravy in a lace bra and jeans. Just call me the southwern wet dream
I suppose I should wish you a happy one year of bumping uglies
I Can't even believe I threw all my pizza rolls at her, I mean not only did i ruin a good meal but now I dont have anymore
It's national boyfriend day supposedly, would it be appropriate if I posted a picture of my dildo?
He was so hammered. He called the cops on the landscapers he thought they were trespassing. 2 were arrested on warrants.
We literally solved our fight using cat pictures on Instagram. True love.
I put on a tiger onsie to initiate sex... It worked
well tomorrow I get to eat fungus and go to an abandoned city.
most people would fear that statement, but i wish to join you
Just got my second shot
Baller. We’re going to be knee deep in strippers and coke in 10 days
Randomize
