I just got a rly sharp new razor and was shaving down there...
and?
RIP clitoris
We just described beer as "big boy apple juice" to his 2 year old.
Was just practicing flip cup with my NyQuil cup...
does anyone know how to get red sharpie out of a white cat?
I doubt the Taliban would support fake nipples.
The first aid guy just told us to go get hammered...I'm taking his advice
How do you say "get out of my apartment" in Spanish. No time to explain, just tell me.
Really? Uh ohh sounds like a double date with extra stripper funnnn
My goal this weekend is to get a number that goes with the penis I take him.
Aspirations
He is nice. Kind of short though. But didn't try to rub his jean cock on me.
Which I appreciated.
I just sent an "I'm sorry I forged a prescription in your name" email. It was one of the more awkward things I've done this week.
I wanna go back to school and change my major to psych just to make a case study out of her
His girlfriend left him for the pizza guy. I am not fucking kidding.
I'm looking for whatever I can find, and afford without having to eat my emotional support cat
They told him he could only pay in monopoly money and he pulls out a wad of it from his pocket... i think im in love
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