Passing las posas road. In a world of pain. Im trying to piss in a bottle through the hole in my crotch. I wish i had a bigger dick.
New first...just saw an entire family of homeless hitch hikers...kids and all. God, i love Oklahoma!
His facebook interests include 'unstrapping velcro'.
I vote intervention dinner around 6, make up movie around 7:30ish, then apology drinks all night. Then hangover waffle house in the morning.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He's. Duct. Taping. His. Phone. To. The. Wall.
She had me dip my balls in cake batter ice cream from cold stone and then tea bag her. Let's get weird just got a whole new meaning.
And by sexy pictures I mean pictures of my penis in strange places. I rock out with my cock out.
He offered to teach me how hula hoop in exchange for acid. I took him up on it.
Drank a beer through my butt, how's your initiation going?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
But once you explained how to fill cupcakes with semen I realize you were harmless and right on my level.
I met a gypsy today. She told me my soul animal was an owl and says she will now remember me as "Owl Girl".
At least I know that however bad my life gets and how low I can feel I'll never feel shitting in a red robin parking lot low
I WANT TO JUMP IN TO A VOLCANO
it'll be like the notebook except for with way more of my penis
It threw me off a little. I had to take a moment and ask myself, "Is he really fingering me in his mom's kitchen while I eat a whopper?"
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