i had to write a bad check to buy franzia last weekend. i have my priorities in line.
Thanksgiving break drinking is a marathon, not a sprint, and i need to be well rested
How do you get a 7 on a pregnancy test?
im calling her cock vulture from now on
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
raced the clock twice to day to see if i could get off before my computer died and before i left for my noon bar crawl... win, win
lets go back to having secrets in our friendship
A gay black guy with blonde hair and a gold tooth just told me he would shit on my face.
Now it's a party.
Sounds good. I will just get tanked here and wear this batman mask.
So did he inherit the massive family cock?
:(
I need more social interactions that don't involve sex
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you remember peeing in the sink while I was throwing up?
No ma'am, I do not. I found a video of us trying to do a trust fall though. Emphasis on the trying.
I'm sure you're still partially crippled from thar blow job on Saturday, so I understand it's probably difficult to text.
Antibacterial soap and prayers does not for spermicide make
I'll truly miss your penis but your use of words and phrases such as bae, yolo, swag, and totes have ruined how attractive you once were.
Drinking and decided to streak in the apartment fountain. Canadian goose shit and sharp rocks on the bottom. I sobered up quick. That was a very bad idea.
Want a bet? I'm a kinky and determined motherfucker with a libido that is not easily stopped
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