I think I kinda wanna bone that ginger from Harry Potter.
You literally just made my flesh crawl.
It smells like Drakkar Noir and desperation out here.
That's why you should quit smoking.
take it from a girl who woke up with a girl in her bed... you were not that drunk.
Her roomates have been scoring her hookups. I got 8.9, best of the week!
Everything smells like blood and olive oil.
He told me he loved me. I didn't know what to say so i just squirted the baby oil at him
Btw. Being a stripper for a week without anyone knowing to pay off my school loan is no longer in my agenda.
Sex in the moonbounce later?
This is why I love you.
I found him in the kitchen singing German metal into a banana while simultaneously mixing brownie batter. He didn't have any pants on.
And thanks to you I'm pretty sure I'm banned from every qdoba in south carolina. And cab company
walked into my roommates bathroom to her throwing up a quesadilla while singing come on skinny taco
If I show up to the mall alone looking like I do to purchase a vibrator and some Japanese food, I would judge me too.
Yeah, first date. First take a pic of him to circulate around for your friends and than have him fill out a short penis questionnaire. Seems completely legit to me.
We're in a hurricane and you send me a video of you playing with your dick while driving! You wanna die?!
Yeah. 11 people shoved in a clown car for a 1 hour party. I'm too old for house parties.
Randomize