think what you will about my sexuality, just get the cigarettes
when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
why are there goldfish crackers all over my bed?
you decided you wanted to name them & keep them as pets.
Guys who wear capris make me want to kill endangered species.
He came on my face and told me I looked like a gingerbread house.
he's paying for my abortion by participating in an alcohol study. dont try to tell me we wouldn't be classy parents
I think he just caught a duck in mid flight
He started humming whilst eating me out. At first it was weird, but my new motto is now don't knock it before you've cum from it
Also, I saved your name as Everclear last night. No idea why I did that.
Immediately after I scarfed down an Applebee's appetizer trio for lunch, my boss sent me on an hour long road trip to pick up some parts. Great. I can't wait to shit my pants on US-31 South.
I hate drunk me more than anyone else in this world
Do you think I need to report to HR that the intern and I had butt sex?
I just had to break into my old house and steal my sex tape. Good times. How have you been?
You just had sex during the movie Radio. This is an all time low
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
Randomize
