In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
Tell me why I go to the dollar store for nail polish remover and a ghetto black dude trys to hit on me in the parking lot, then he gets in line behind me with a dousche bag literally and that is his only purchase.
Dude, I found out the hard way that she wipes back to front. I ate her out and had to throw up.
i have no idea who im with but someones making meatballs. im going to stay.
I cant yet im literally covered in lube but I will later
Let's just do a victory lap through all of our exes.
We crashed a rave, threw glitter all over Gay Dan and the bartender, broke a chandelier and called ourselves the Kings of Neon.
did you not get the photos of the finger bruises on my ass?
i dont know how he's 22 and thinks emoticons will get him laid. lady boner just died.
I'm shotgunning a 12 pack at a bus stop. This is why we pay the rent with an auto withdrawal at the beginning of the month
My boobs just got me out of my third ticket last night
i'm so proud. i woke up to nearly seven feet of basketball player in my bed this morning
you win. again.
Didn't think the day of being the oldest in a club would be when I'm twenty one. Even the bouncer looked surprised when he ID me.
WE HAVE WINE WHERE ARE YOU GUYS WE ARE BY THE GIANT EAGLE
I slept on her porch...in her dads handcuffs
I wanna get to the point where I can just send a question mark and get an exclamation point in response
Randomize
