I just masterbated while imagining him getting hit by a truck. I have hit a completely unacceptable level of anger & bitterness. Help.
he made me scream out "#24" while we fucked...no more football players
Best morning ever. I saw a bum giving another bum a blowjob downtown.
I don't think I'd trust a marching band with trampolines to not cause serious damage to themselves/ property.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just so you know, a 6'7" tall gay man, with a martini in one hand and a fairy wand in the other, is not a force to be reckoned with...don't ask.
You don't realize it's a small world until your ex girlfriend's dad unintentionally messages you on grindr..what.the.fuck.
I choose McDonald's breakfast at 1:28am over sex anytime
you know i have almost 1500 fb friends but not ONE drunk booty call?
He ate the contents of an ashtray and didn't puke, I think he can handle drinking a fifth to himself.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know you had a good night when your wearing you best friends pants to work the next day
... Okay, fine. But I don't want to be a better person tonight. I'll be a better person tomorrow.
If one more person says Merry Christmas to me I’m going to take a pen out of my pocketbook and stab them in the eye
Dont ask questions just say words. where can i find plan b?
Seriously considering taking a nap at lunchtime in my car. That. Hung. Over.
At some point you said you just wanted to get laid, so we had a moment of silence for your dead sex life...
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