after we finished he farted and said 'i've been holding that one in'
he stole me 6 pairs of frilly undies and proclaimed "your ass looks like a 5 in those. it'll be a 10 in these bad boys". every girl needs a gay bff.
You burnt your salmon and tried to mail it. Post marked to: Starving Kid in Africa
i dont understand why you dont get why i love him. i opened the bathroom door and he had his penis in his right hand and a mcdouble in his left.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't know, but I don't want you to think its ok to show up at my house at 4 am with a gorilla suit and a bucket of pinnapple and think id be ok with it
I think I'm interested in anyone that recognizes I actually have a pulse
You take your time. Wallowing in last nights filth is the best way to get over a hangover
Ginormous penis in the breeze, cumming champagne showers into your eye
He screamed AMERICA, took a shot of vodka out of a Tupperware container, and then asked if he could see my tits
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
dude this night sums up my single life. naked, crying, and covered in honey. i need to get laid.
There's a lady lying down on the sidewalk in front of our building smoking a cig
*goes to show prof a picture* *forgets tit pic is in camera roll*
It's not my fault I make her feel like a Taylor Swift album
If I take a couple more shots I won't even know he's a Mormon that drives a motorcycle
I'm basically doing the Walk of Shame without the added bonus of having sex last night. That doesn't look good on anyone.
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