Ps there is totally a drug addled prostitute in olympic pizza asking for change for a 100 bill
what is it about summer that misdirects my moral compass so much?
you called her butter tits and then threw up in your cup. i dont know if theres any way to come back from that
We somehow managed to get the sumo-wrestler costume into the washing machine, but I don't think the cupcake icing completely came off... And it still smells like tequila.
Vodka drinking games. Where you wake up next to a douche lord and see your thong in the blinds.
You can laugh all you want but 99 grapes is a lot stronger than what you were drinking.
Sleeping in a car was not on my list of plans for the night.
Well, at some point in her life every girl has to decide how much weird she's willing to tolerate for hot tall banker cock
Your choices in alcohol this weekend are thoroughly disappointing
SHE'S PREGNANT AS SHIT, AND I JUSR PEELED A CLEMENTINE TO CHASE SHOTS WITH!! COULD LIFE GET ANY BETTER!?
Welcome to the club of "Sick of cleaning up actual shit." We meet on the 3rd Sunday of each month. Bring your ceremonial viking helmet.
Also you can't just sext a Michelle quote from Full House.
I can’t believe I made out with a flat earther and didn’t know about it until now!
Apparently i disappeared and no one found me until the morning , but i have fifty missed calls
How you run into a glAss door three times in a row I do not know
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