can we get nightvision for the apartment?
She was really sick last night--but i was too drunk to bring her chicken noodle soup after the bar, so went by taco bell and got her a chicken burrito instead
He's engaged. If the world's smallest penis can find true love than I can too.
please dont make me drink to the titanic soundtrack
i just thought that perhaps i was done with the "boning on someone else's futon" stage of my life. guess not.
Inquiring minds want to know if your Bf is circumcised
Should I take my grandma to a keg tomorrow or not? Serious question
So, this year for my birthday, want to get rip-roaring schmammered and watch my episode of my super sweet 16? We can do lines off my tiara.
People are stripping in McDonalds. Do I join?
YES.
She called it a palate cleanser. She and her friend dike it out once a year before returning to dick
Together or do they pick up? How far do they go? IS AN AUDIENCE PERMITTED? GODAMIT ANSWERS MAN!!!!!!
I don't know if your celebrity crush has ever asked you for nudes, but it's fucking awesome
I mean I just feel if I'm not being fat and lazy then I'm not really being myself
I officially have worse injuries from a baby shower than roller derby.
Im riding the bus with beer in one hand and chapagne in the other. I love weddings.
I have to touch the horse lube. :-(
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