I wish life had little blips of pornography
so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
Then we managed to set a grill and all 24lbs of meat on it on fire. I didn't help because I was filled with alcohol and extra flammable.
I just criticized a porno's use of editing. Film school is ruining me.
I cant wait for your democrat phase to be over.
i was getting a blow-job tonight in the mens bathroom of a bar and the bouncer comes in and says "bro i don't mean to cock block but you cant do that here."
I just asked the bartender if I could get insurance on my drink in case I spilled it.
I saw you eating fruit and doing shots off people passed out
I just entered us to win a trip to Vegas for spring break. GET YOUR VAGINA READY FOR THE ULTIMATE DICK HUNT!
Weirdly I'm doing ok, but I've tested positive for chlamydia, I wanted to let you know
Can I color on your dick again?
I just want to dump glitter on my floor and roll in it like a cat in catnip.
Nothing says hey I wanna be your friend again like ambushing me with a dick pic
congratulations on joining the accidental bisexual club
Have you ever forgotten how to pee? I did last night. Standing in front of the urinal with dick in hand. WTF were we drinking???
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