He's been sleeping iwht ***
Nooo
Yeah I don't even know how, she looks like her mom smoked crack while she was in the womb
And then hit her in the face with a shovel
Just think, the more you drink, the more options you'll have of people you want to hook up with.
well my last 2 orgasms were over shoe sales at macy's. what does that tell you?
Stop it. You sound like you're giving birth.
It's really awkward to greet the pastor when I know I've licked chocolate syrup off his daughter's chest.
WHY WOULD YOU LET ME MAKE THAT MUCH NOISE DURING SEX IN RESIDENCE ?!
I tried to push your face into the pillow but then you kicked like a donkey.
I love tequila.
i was surprised by the severity of his small dick condition
he opened the microwave and beer cans poured out
I just bedazzled my weight watchers points calculator. You can tell I'm gay.
so i ran into nick. i may be more gay than anticipated
She looks like a Midwestern news anchor that got fired so she has done nothing but eat for the past 6 months.
Having boobs is probably the greatest thing in the world, free booze all around
My lighter is stuck in my beard.
I don't think you understand I turned down McDonalds for you.
Did I ever tell you what happened that night after he ran you over?
Randomize
