I'm buying a chandelier at walmart. WHO'S CLASSY NOW, BITCHES.
i dont know what it was but it was definately NOT a vagina
I'm going to see if it catches on fire again, then I'll make the decision.
Be there soon... with munchies, blow jobs and shoulder rubs.
I made out with an Italian cab driver. Not cool. Help. Good news he will drive us anywhere we want to go as long as you cook food?!?!?! I want to melt into the pavement.
If by date you mean washing Pizza house down with a bottle of wine, then yes I have a date.
Guess what I'm doing tonight? Tacos and strip chess.
I have accepted that I am a sexual predator. What I can't accept is the lack of sexual men for me to seduce in this town.
You were taking in your sleep. You were like Jess that's that animal we were talking about and you Hugged her feet
At this point it's more of an experiment to see how much actual bush growth is possible. See, being single can be both educational and surprisingly comfy!
I might as well just sew it shut at this point.
I probably would do him if given the chance but how awkward would Bible study be after that.
Definitely woke up.this morning to a random girls head in my toilet and her mom knocking on my door.
My chance to home wreck was right in front of me and I didn’t grab it by the balls
We already gave up cheese, how are we supposed to give up coke?
Randomize
