so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
They need a stunt cock, be about 20 more minutes.
He practically bottle-fed me Jameson, like I was a baby chimpanzee on those nature specials.
My goal for this summer is to make enough extra money to be able to afford the ticket for water skiing naked.
My sink just fell out of the wall. I can't deal with this right now
you wouldn't believe how quickly birth control dissolves in vodka
everyone at work keeps looking at me like they know I got the herp this weekend
I'm going to have to start playing roller derby again so I can blame my sex-related bruises on that.
He left an apology note saying he had to work and that there was coffee, OJ and food on the table with two Excedrin. I left his spare key with the door guard and she said "too bad I don't go for skinny white boys or I'd jump you both!" Best one night stand ever.
I don't think tequila will soothe the spots where my tonsils used to be.
I let him do a line off my nipple in exchange for his prescription pain pills. I feel like 3/4 Vegas stripper, 1/4 underbelly of society.
The NSA quit spying on phones. I'm sending you SO MANY dick pics.
I opened the bathroom door and the starting point gaurd was eating out my art history professor
Thanks for supporting me through Robs retirement. I'm still in shock, but your dick helped.
Just saw you run by my class yelling "fuck you!". Good luck and stay human!
Randomize
