its always fun the next morning to look around the room and see where all the clothing landed.
Her dress is practically falling off. It must know I'm here.
Urine might work for jellyfish stings, but we found out it doesn't work well for nose bleeds...
I've been meaning to ask you. The first night in the city did we do key bumps with a suicidal homeless man? My memory is fuzzy
Oh my god I forgot there were Band-Aids on my nipples
More cowboy butts than you can shake a stick at, oh joy.
Maybe you need to change your pickup move. The "hey check these out" titty flash gets you the wrong kinda man.
It's time to run my sex life like a basketball team. Got the lesson Clint!
My apologies. I'll try not to let my dick interfere with official work duties in the future.
listen I will take literally anything I can get my tiny gay fingers on
handcuff keys just fell out of my bra....wtf happened last night?
last time we were there you stole a tap from the toilets. How are you confused that your bag is full of baubles you clearly can't stop collecting their furnishings
The air I exhale reeks of whiskey and bad decisions
He gave his liver a pep talk before the vodka chugging started
He had me sit on his face until I begged him to stop, then held me there 5 minutes longer. I rested my head on his chest, told him I needed time to recover....and slept for 6 hours. By the time I woke, he was already at work. I just sent him a countdown times until his shift is over.
Randomize
