omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
She was giving me great head...... until I asked her how much this was going to cost.... she left abruptly
Mom got me cough medicine that tastes like tequila . She said she took taste tests. Best mom ever.
Handle of 100 proof captain dressed like a pilgrim here we go
we had to stop you from eating moldy cake.. twice.
This does no justice to the amount of paint I'm covered in or the amount of balls I'm tripping.
My vagina would be awesome. I would be the most popular girl in the village.
My Mom printed off all of my Augusts text messages. Apparently I've been drinking WAY too much and having an intermediate drug problem. I have to go home everyw weekend for the rest of the semester
bad night - i tried for naughty librarian but could only manage to pull off pissed off barrista.
And I told him that even though were not together, if he has sex with anyone I would have sex with someone else, video tape it and send it to him.
I'm not sure how long my penis is exactly, but I will tell you it resembles a bendy straw
You know I've done a lot of messed up stuff. But I never thought I would have to put a bandaid on my dick. Yet here we are.
Her boyfriend offered to buy me a vibrator. I'm not sure how to feel about that.
Happy 4 year arrest-aversary! I promise no thanksgiving has been as eventful as that one haha..
I’ve basically been controlling him with my tits for months now, so I can’t even imagine what would happen if I start banging him
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