what about "I will fuck you for a jamba juice" do you not understand?
you took him to the bathroom with you to pee and told him he had to hold your hand..but he couldn't turn on the lights because you didnt want him to hear you peeing..and still got laid. i wish i had your life.
i'm considering texting him with "i'm leaving the country for a year, wanna fuck?"
do it. it's every man's dream.
I wasn't expecting a boner of this magnitude
the general consensus of people in the room is that i should have another bottle of wine.
"people in the room" being me.
She gave me head while using a laptop on my stomach to go online. I've never seen a better feat of multitasking.
well, the two that sent pics I've already been with, so at least its not just BAM HERE'S MY PENIS IN YOUR INBOX ENJOY THOSE MEGAPIXELS
You peed up the stairs in front of everyone then blamed it on the dog
Its a sick, sad, world when parents get more ass then you.
plus there's no nice way to tell a guy you physically hate the shape of their cock.
Nothing better than going to Mass on Easter Sunday with "I love penis" henna tattooed across your back. Love your Indian culture.
Woke up to the frozen soundtrack blasting in the living room best one night stand ever
Didn't have the heart to tell him that while he was eating my ass I was laughing, not moaning, into the pillow
My dad just said "fuck circus"
Dude i woke up today by a pile of fried chicken and wearing a bra
.......stop going to frat parties....
Randomize
