what if I'm pregnant?
smusmorshion
I just google mapped his house on satellite so i can really see how much money he has. Does that make me shallow?
No, the sea-green pills were klonopin, the bright blue ones are adderall. you're probably going to have to adjust your plans for the day.
Drunk roommate walked in on us and asked if we wanted to go eat a sandwich with her in the bathroom.
She texted me shhh....im drunk, secret booty call...how could i say no?
Fair enough. I'm gonna finish off half a bottle of Brunettes in the shower anf relive the good ol' days. We need a reunion
We stared down the barrel of pure insanity, took more and the electric elephant god rewarded our fearlessness by giving me golden skulls and naked women crawling out of the walls. I love acid
The whole time we were fucking I kept thinking, "My dad would love this cologne. I'll have to ask him where he got it." the highlight of the night is that I figured out my dad's birthday gift.
my math prof is telling us what to do in a gun fight. i dont want to live in oakland anymore.
Today marks the 365th consecutive day of jerkin it. I couldn't have done it without you guys. #onlynewyearsresolutionaccomplished
I got pushed into some bald man in the pit and spent the next few minutes with my face against his head. Man I love ecstasy.
You better fucking tell me or I'm turning blow job week into go fuck yourself week.
I may have just poured a honey apple beer onto a dried apple slice to rehydrate it. This is my day.
I will consider it. I need to determine if ogling him is worth almost certain death via zipline.
He fucked me in one of the back rooms at the club then gave me an altoid. I have mixed feelings about it still.
Randomize
