i feel rough
just turned on the light, there is blood EVERYWHERE.
time to smoke my breakfast
His second form of ID was an emergency room wristband from an hour ago. What the fuck is going on right now
Haha yeah he had an allergic reaction to the alcohol earlier. He thinks that if he only drinks vodka he will be ok...
i wanted to tell my neighbors to shut up it was 4am, but listening to her rag on him for his minute man routine was actually entertaining
Wow, haven't had to deal with the 'stoned at the dinner table' scenario in a while
he pretended not to hear me say our safety word. how do you think I feel?
She threw up in the hot tub how's your night
I had a great penis washing session in the sink before I left. Washed off all the bar and green beer
walking back to the dorm.. she is flashing evryone, demanding beads. we tried to stop her and now she just keeps yelling "Bourbon st bitchesss"... you get her tomorrow
Glow parties are what I live for
Your priorities in life astound me
we're going to the olympic park to run the 100m yeaaaahhh
it's 3am. Nothing could possibly go wrong here.
I climbed out of the shower to him sitting on the floor trimming his pubes with nail clippers, we both just started laughing at how drunk we were
Did my roommate wake up in your girlfriend's apartment in drag again?
Did you have a good sleep?
if a good sleep includes waking up cuddling a bottle of wine I had a GREAT sleep
my mom tells me this morning that i was blasting teach me how to dougie at 2 am last night and refused to leave her room until she dougied with me
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