benefit of terrorism--they won't let you buy random one way plane tickets to random parts of the country for no reason nonmatter how high you are.
she gave me a handjob in the middle of the night and my stomach growled so she walked out totally naked and came back 5 minutes later with two sandwiches. who the fuck says getting married is awful?
Best morning ever. I saw a bum giving another bum a blowjob downtown.
This has been the biggest binge-drinking season of the decade.
Februarys looking very promising in the vaginal department
Yesterdays boozy weather forecast has been extended to today
I'm high. Everything has a 45° angle. That is as far as my eyes open
IM WEARING A FLAG
So that's a no to the clothes then
FLAG
I'm sure you're still partially crippled from thar blow job on Saturday, so I understand it's probably difficult to text.
the amount of times i have been intoxicated, barefoot, and in a robe at 3 am at the quick check by your house is impressive, especially since i live an hour away
I guess the wine stains on your shirt and the $2 vodka tonics you're sweating out just scream, "Welcome to DC, please ask me for directions."
You're going to replace me with a robot made of heating blankets and a vibrator?
I was at his place until 2am. We just sat really close an stared at each other. I think you are right. Germans must not have feelings. Not even tingly ones in their pants.
Your amazing boobs made me fall in love with boobs. I never cared about boobs you should be proud
If I wanna spend the whole night tied up and getting railed I'm allowed to do so
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