Is it necrophilia if we're both dead?
Wish you were here....
And I wish your mouth was around my cock, but that never happens, does it?
Outta milk. Using rum instead for pancake mix. Drunk Thursday is a gooo
Joe decreed the livingroom and the hallway up to the burn mark his kingdom. I think this is the point of 'stage an intervention'
I'm 11 for 13 getting drunker than the person who's birthday it is
WE SHOULD FUCK TWO GUYS THAT LIVE TOGETHER
THAT WOULD BE SO CONVENIENT WE COULD CARPOOL
Nothing bonds a father and daughter like washing her puke off the front steps
and i do believe that will be the last time you send me a photograph of our mother in her underwear.
unless you have a dick and you were thinking of chopping that off
that game of battleshots got way too fucking intense. why does the couch have burn marks now.
Thanks for reminding me of all the hookups my brain has been trying to suppress...
That's what friends are foooooooor!
I'm a fuck boy trapped in a single mom's body.
I was told i took a shot doing a headstand in the backseat then proceeded to barf all over my face
I had no idea you were so talented.
You know that text I sent you last night at 2? That was 5 minutes before I ran face first into a wall of not okay
I have a dinner date combo blowjob event with Tristan tonight.
Randomize
