I am engaged
To a real live girl that has met me
Have you ever noticed that nowhere is the same thing as now here, i get my best ideas when i smoke
i need a wealthy benefactor or a cocktail job. or to start stripping. or kill myself. whatever.
he sat in the bathtub shirtless yelling in gibberish for 40 minutes. funniest. stoner. ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so its thursday, which means its time to resume communication with you
Woke up in a kilt. And it's not my kilt. Drinking was a success.
ugh he was not leaving in the morning so i tried to scare him by crying and saying i wasnt ready to lose my virginity.
He drew a face on his balls with a sharpie. It was like giving head to a unicorn.
Your cock is gonna weep like a baby
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
2nd year in a row being a arrested before school starts...tradition at its finest
so I definitely just chased tequila shots with a biscuit covered in sausage gravy
Thats fucking manlier than riding a bear into battle
I just delete my bank app from my phone to have enough storage to download tindr. Is this my life now?
i want george washington to fuck me as hard as he can holy shit
it was the most awkward makeout ever. it was record breaking really
...i feel like you have a lot of those.
I have had flashes of 69ing, a strawberry flavored condom and begging him to sleep naked.
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