if i die, you can have my worn out liver and american apparel deep v's.sell the liver to a chinese restaurant
Her underwear doesnt even match. If youre going to be a face book whore at least have matching shit.
Dude i thought about you literally the second after I came. This friendship is starting to cross some serious boundaries
P.s. remind me to tell you about the porno that Paul envisioned starring you. It's wizard of oz themed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Bring enough bail money and little extra for tacos after
Someone just bought me a one liter long island and call me maybe is on. I'm going to die
Why am I the only one golf clapping for the vomiting girl on the train who just fell of her seat into her own vomit
I think i'm going to homewreck at this Disney on Ice show.
So what kind of fun pills do we have for the amusement park tomorrow?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm to sober to make life ruining decisions and alcohol is to expensive at this bar for me to fear that level of drunk happening
I swear to god if I see a single piece of genitalia I'm driving back to LI and smacking you back to the Italian Renaissance
he told me that I'm basically going to be the mom of the house when they move in...i like to see it as being a MILF without the responsibility of real children
Hey! you should come over!
Who is this? The number is saved as "Sexy Awesome"
If I get really high and watch Beauty and The Beast on our Netflx account, will you judge me?
Only if you start before I get home!
I have had flashes of 69ing, a strawberry flavored condom and begging him to sleep naked.
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