I thought she had blonde hair
No, Gonorrhea actually
i popped this huge zit on her back while she was blowing me. it was like a disgusting metaphor for what happened 30 seconds later.
the sex wasnt even worth changing my sheets
I just smoked a bowl while riding a horse. This has been a productive vacation.
She is definitely tripolar. Like bipolar but better/worse.
i feel like the wall was a canvas for his penis.
You force fed me chocolate chips and avocados for 3 hours and kept asking me about my trip to sweden when I was 4.
I just remembered that last night I ate nachos off of someone else's table with a stranger
By the way anyone who is willing to be in the film while tripping gets free shrooms.
We did hand stand push-ups while beer bonging. Its now a thing
I understand, but unless there is an intervention for me being planned, i DON NOT want to talk about my life choices
How was my night? He had a picture of his mom on his night stand and he yelled "Papi like" when he came. Fuck tequila.
11:30 you texted me saying he was on his way. 11:37 you said, "Oh my God that was terrible."
don't worry dude i have your phone, text me when youre gonna come get it
I’ve slept with a Senior, a Freshman and a Junior so far. I’m a Sophomore away from hitting for the cycle
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