I think I'm pregnant with his hipster baby. It keeps kicking my stomach to the beat of mgmt songs.
do you ever get flashbacks of ppl you had sex with and just shudder at how gross they were/how drunk you were?
story of my life.
Okay good. And who the fuck put a condom on my foot. That shit hurt
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
Totally forgot I asked the cop for a theoretical fist bump and he still let me drive away
I reek of vagina.. My cab driver commented.
This girl invited us back on the promise of weed and strudel...she delivered neither.
Don't do shots out of Tostitos scoops.
Way to go. Now you have no beer and I have a cold tit.
Is it completely inappropriate to base my morning after pill purchase on if they sell coffee or not?
We drank vodka and koolaid through a traffic cone. It got rowdy.
I've just had my first cup of coffee in a month and I moaned at the first drink and honestly I think this is the most sexual expreiance in 6 months
She's seen your dick through your pants. You don't need to ask
tell raye i said hi and sorry for bleeding on the limes
I have acquired a mango...tonight is successful so far
Her name is susan
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