She kept screaming "yeah! You pick up my books!" the whole time. . .
Im watching hello kitty on qvc debating if its a good idea to cook bagel bites on my space heater
On a list of weird places to get a bj, how weird is in the basement of a pharmacy
We banged through her entire lady gaga playlist. I can die happy now
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The National Anthem was on so I had to have a beer
And then I saw the naval officer and gave up that whole new leaf thing
she just came into my room, drunkenly shoved six dollars into my bra and told me to spend it on chicken wings.
The lifeguard told us we had to move Mike before the tide came in when he passed out.
if i can get a chik with a dibaetes pump naked a sling certainly isnt going to get in my way
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If thou arrisest to consciousness before I, rise me to an office of alertness for occupations such as brunch. Warm Regards, your roommate.
Ive waited a long time for a girl with prescriptions like yours.
he pissed the bed, like I literally woke up and he was pissing right beside me. With the electric blanket he's lucky he didn't get electrocuted
I woke up on the green space outside our dorm cradling a watermelon and sucking my thumb. College is crazy man.
*goes to show prof a picture* *forgets tit pic is in camera roll*
I remember her making the first martini but the rest of the weekend is a blur of vodka, high heels and sex toys.
First time being used by a cougar. Definitely okay with it
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