well i just puked at a family gathering so i can cross that off the bucket list
strike ten. I need to stop drinkng
Nothin says happy bday jesus like a shot with your loved ones.
some guy just walked by in the street and for 5 seconds yelled "IMM SOOOO HORNYYYYYY!!!!"
I am way too high for this. Some guy just keeps talking about music and life goals and he apparently has lived in every city we mention we are going
In Berlin they just cured HIV with stem cells. I am hereby fucking anything that moves.
I think I love you, but I may be biased because we had pirate sex.
For the record, saying you're friends with the owner doesn't work when the owner is the one throwing you out.
So I am guessing last night was a success we are all accounted for and only 3 of us have hospital bracelets on
I woke up with no pants, someone elses shirt, but my new years crown still on. That is dedication.
Just paid off my possession ticket on 4/20. Helloooo awesome.
Halloween night fail: My boob sweat from keeping my phone in my bra caused the front screen to stop working from water damage.
Just woke up in my fuck buddies bed with, from the looks of her ass and side boob, a girl that is not my fuck buddy. This should be interesting
Just gave my thesis presentation, pretty sure I made out with the admissions woman last night.
How's the party?
I'm watching two people get flogged. Sothere's that.
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