hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
yo dude i was totally schwabbin last night.
what does that even mean?
you ever see those charles schwabb commercials, where the people are like half cartoon half real.... well yeah i saw that in real life.
i really wish my pants would only unzip when im sober
They normally just get fucked up and see who can hold their hand on the exhaust the longest. It's great
Dude you should see the looks were getting for ordering a pitcher of beer with breakfast.
Everyone threw up but him. I took off my shirt because I puked on it. There were also a lot of drag queens involved.
Last time i carry you out of a forest
I just finished packing for spring break, took me 4 minutes. To be fair though I only put my trunks, a pair of underwear, and 50 condoms in my bag.
My phone autocorrects "pooping" to "popping" and I'm like DO YOU EVEN KNOW ME??!
We both work at 8am and I have to shower but my roommate is passed out on our bathroom floor with the door locked. Merry Christmas.
Well.. If you trust a test that only costs a dollar, I'm not pregnant
The fact that he quoted freebird as his breakup speech was a little more classy than expected
I don't fucking know. He perched his parrot on his dick. I left after that.
I'll do whatever I want when I'm 80.
If you are still alive at 80 I demand a medical explanation.
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
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