So I'm cool with the whole break up, but it sure is a shame we didn't get to use those handcuffs.
There is a half eaten corn dog and soy sauce on the counter... WTF did you eat last night??
"Shots" has been nominated for a grammy. Now all of the US has sunken to our level...
i just bought weed at the top of a mountain, best decision of our lives to go to school in colorado.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im bored tell me something entertaining
You got period blood on my carpet. I lied to my mom and said it was jam.
Why did you put hummus in my pillow case?
Who topped off the "random beer mix" beer bong with a pinch of pepper?? All you could taste was busch and pepper...
Oh man, buzzed lunch fridays almost got out of hand.
You text him a porn site address and said GOODBYE ... I think he got the hint
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is selling savings bonds for acid money something a normal person does?
I woke up in a strange bathroom. Was I blonde when you left me last night?
when I die covered in cocaine, hookers, and tequila at 73 years old just remember that I once had a tweet with that many retweets
Sometimes being bisexual is a curse. Turns out I banged both of her older twin brothers last summer.
We never leave a bad bitch behind. its a party foul..we'll find you somehow
I just smoked part of an Oreo cuz I thought it was some hash you left
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