But guess what. I'm gonna roll over and go to sleep cuz there's no cuddling in phone sex.
Oh god. There is a bite mark in the bar of soap. Please tell me I was not that wasted.
started to yawn and threw up hamburger helper instead. awesome night.
I can't make Walk of Shame Wednesdays a recurring theme.
Just saw a crackhead get taken down by pd in the canal. Its offically spring
There were so few words spoken that I'm not sure if it was make-up or break-up sex.
He met a random girl on the bus home and decided to go to Spain with her. The blackout decisions are becoming internationally epic. He has work in the morning.
After this weekend, it looks come this holiday season I'll be walking in a winter abortionland.
crossing my fingers that hitting golf balls off my pourch was a dream and not something that actaculy happened
Watching him is like watching a star slowly implode
U know when u get really drunk and u don't think anyone can see what your doing? If I'm that drunk the possibilities are endless
We are so drunk half our team had to bowl with a chaperone. We won every game. We drink
Someone should make a valentines day card that says "I like the way you continuously consume thc with no concept of a limit other than drug supply" Because I'd send that to you.
Did you clean his pubes up off the table yet?
I'm both gender and math confused
Randomize
