Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
It just gets louder and louder too...dear god. Her poor vagina.
Disasters an understatement. Hurricane alpha chi omega hit. On my way to buy carpet cleaner, super glue, and a new liver. Be back soon.
Started with us just having a beer. Now Ivan lit a torch to walk to the store, Ben smashed a 26 in the parking lot, and they're throwing broken shot glasses. Fratio Friday is something.
diet's not working. come over. i need someone to fuck the hungry out of me.
I learned something last night. Strippers can be on house arrest?
You could become Eskimo brothers with my dad. How can you pass that up? You pussy.
It's been over a year since we've been get-so-drunk-you-throw-beer-cans-at-fat-girls-drunk together. That needs to change.
Just walked by a girl saying to her friend "honestly you coulda given me any dude and I woulda fucked him"
You should've introduced yourself
I was gonna make a strong case for you to be my midnight kiss, but poptarts sound good too
How do you politely tell someone to get out of your house in Russian
2016 was supposed to be my year of being a ho, but I guess 2017 might be too.
THIS IS NOT A LAUGHING MATTER, CAITLIN. MY PARENTS ARE FUCKING. LOUDLY.
Ya i'm marrying the man who can hear/smell this level of flatulence and stick around
No, I told him I was busy again this weekend. Eventually he’ll learn. Plus, absence makes the cock grow harder
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