Denial is the first step to alcoholism…and I don't hate it
tod's in jail
he was afraid of holiday checkpoints so we let him ride my mom's tandem bike home. by himself. at 4 am.
he's chasing his jose cuervo with hot tub water
I FOUND THE PROF I'M GOING TO FUCKKKK.
omg theres cum all over the american flag and now its up in front of his house.
What I love about college? The kid tripping balls has a kayak made readily available to him on any given Wednesday, Saturday, or Sunday.
nothing worse than walking out of class after 3 hours and having covered exactly zero information
walking out with herpes. that would be worse
Her desktop wallpaper is a collage of penises she fucked.
He just walked from his house to mine. Walked in and asked for a hug and then left.. And he's sober.
And everyone was looking at me because it was cold and I was drunk and may have screamed "oh fuck" ... You know what, fuck that. What do people think they're getting at Denny's 2 in the morning
Learn from me. Do not smoke cigs and fold laundry in your room. The cigarette will fall into the dresser without you noticing and your shirts will be on fire. Wanna go shopping tomorrow? I need some new shirts.
This guy is selling weed on the train. Like... Straight up. No fucks given.
I used my dress as a plate for pizza rolls last night
I think his dick was bigger than his dog
Not entirely sure how I got drunk off 2 mimosas but here I am
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