he kept bringing up different times we had sex and i wouldnt say anything back. i would never confirm nor deny the situation...like a politician ya kno
there should be laws that require people like to me to be on birth control.
Her gay brother kept hitting on me and cockblocking me. Don't even begin to tell me how bad your night was.
Ok if you are accepting my apology, please continue to ignore me. If you are not, please fill out the brief survey that follows, to help me improve my people relations: a) your a bitch please leave me alone b)your crazy pls leave me alone c) I never cared ab u please leave me alone. D) all of the above e) all of the above but I wouldn't mind still fucking u. F) who are you again? Your answer will not b shared and will b used in accord. With the law. TY
Did you know that if you hit someone in the head with a frozen loaf of bread you can knock them unconscious?
I just horrified a large group of people. Congrats on dating me.
Still losing my voice, so I am trying to get it back through drugs. Welcome to my Monday logic.
Hey please buy toilet paper today. Plastic grocery bags are starting to hurt now
Whatever. I just smoked another bowl so I don't care and wow I just noticed how fast my thumb moves when I text. I'm amazing.
He's beautiful. His facial hair makes me wanna cum in it
Ew, no. But yeah I feel the same
Seriously I'm not after your cock. It's a nice bonus, like finding $20 in the dryer, but not the reason I hang out with you.
I slept with my wedding DJ..... I think this means my life has come full circle
Well, I'll handle this like I always do. Black the fuck out, make out with randoms, give out my number like candy. You know. Standard operating procedure
Can I get my morals surgically removed?
If he flies out here I will sleep with him. I have morals, but not when it comes to southern accents
Randomize
