I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
alcohol turns me into mario batali of easy mac
and you tried to get a free burrito from Potbelly's
They want to listen to Lady Gaga while they puke.
im pretty sure all they do is fuck. and talk in baby talk. its two babys fucking basically.
But please don't judge me if i smell like mustard
you were wearing a pair of wings and handing out McDonalds apple pies, if anyone refers to you as the "Rave Fairy" you now know why.
THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
So I met my girlfriends dad last night. Or should I say I re-met that mall cop that had to tackle me.
took off my bra and popcorn fell out of it. im gonna puke at this wedding...
I just faked an orgasm while masturbating. Idk what exactly my problem is but I have one
We drove through Taco-Bell on our way to the ER
I think we should have a sex position advent calendar
Drunk me started making nachos apparently but never got to the part with the cheese. There are chips everywhere
He lured me round with the prospect of sex and then made me proofread his CV and spoon. I fucking hate this guy.
oh, he’s out of jail btw. as of about 6pm. one of his customers bonded him out apparently lol
Like he really got a coke fiend to bond him out?
Randomize