God I love babysitting. They pay me $10 an hour to watch movies and sext
mid-sex i was thinking.. these are not the right balls slapping me
At least our walk of shames never included a bag of chips and a jar of queso..
At home depot. Final room inspection is tmrow, gotta paint over the puke stains
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently as I was doing the walk of shame home my dad's date was on her way to hers. hoes come in all ages these days
I don't think I have but I might've died. If I have then come get me, I'm in the flower bed. And still game.
its like the body should be a temple but we treat it like a kmart
What kind of a birthday party isn't a get drunk and ruin everything party
You know how the doctor said I need to stop being vegan unless I find a way to get more protein? There's protein in beer. The doctor wants me to drink more beer.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I greatly enjoy being related to her. Even if is it only by a penis.
Bringing families together since 1987
I HAVE PIZZA MONEY AT ALL TIMES IT'S CALL EMERGENCY PLANNING
I spent all the money my grandpa gave me for Christmas last night….solid start to 2015
And if you haven't kicked a pigeon you haven't started your morning right
I keep finding granola in my bed. This is what I get for sleeping with a guy from Oregon.
Drunk and bowling. Only good things can come of this
Randomize