office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
I'm trying real hard to keep it on the DL how drunk I am at lunch with my grandma.
Just getting around to doing laundry. Jesus there's a lot of blood on my birthday dress.
I am the drunkest girl in the tree.
Ah shit... I sleep-ate chocolate pudding again.
Sorry I sent so many blank messages. My hands are slippery. Don't ask why.
Let's paint friendship bongs
He's the kind you'd bring home and you'd wake up and all your food would be half eaten on the kitchen floor and all your socks would be missing.
Bad news: I found out that girl you want has a boyfriend. Good news: she'll probably cheat on him with you. Better news: after seeing the way she treats him, that's the most interaction you're going to want with her anyway. Trust me.
I just had sex over my oven then high fived the guy. It's going to be a good year.
I just want to meet whoever runs the hall cameras
hahahaha I don't. Watch one day i'll be walking along and someone will stop me and say "oh you're that one girl who is out. of. control." But then they'd probably give me a high five.
They have a genuine stripper pole secured to the floor of their living room. I am thoroughly take advantage of it. I've made $5 so far. Why don't more places have poles??!
I woke up sandwiched between them, all of us naked, and they were just sharing a cigarette, a donut, and the paper like it was just some normal post-threesome Sunday brunch.
On the way home she told me she was in kindergarten when 9/11 happened
I need to show you how I feel about you by fucking you repeatedly.
Randomize
